Don led me down the hall to room 101 where the door was wide open. Every chair occupied. Immediately, I wanted to turn around and run. Don went to the front of the table with me following him. Everyone stopped talking and looked at us. “Everyone this is Sandy.” I nodded. Everyone said in unison. “Welcome.”
“Sandy.” Don said, “Come over here there is a seat.” I sat down, and he whispered in my ear. “We are going to go around the room, and everyone has a chance to talk or not. And since this is your first visit no pressure okay.”
On the other side of me was a brown eyed young woman who also whispered in my ear, “We will help you here. Just remember, ‘Feeling is Healing.” I sat that first night numbly. Weeks later I started to talk like a dying solider trying to spit out his last words before death. Wait, It gets worse. In my desperation Divorce Recovery gave me a wonderful feeling to walk into the room and be recognized, acknowledge and helped.
The whole experience felt like to me as if the room was a giant bird’s nest. All i had to do was sit in the middle of the nest. Everyone in the room would spread their wings around and across me until I was warm and safe. There was a lot of hugging and tears. And a place to go on holidays and such kind people in my group.
They would share their stories and i began to realize how lucky I really was in my life. One night I was no longer the longest married, divorced person in the group. April came in. She was 80 years old. And her husband had run off with a 65 year old and was draining their bank account. We all tried hard to comfort here. She kept saying over and over, “How do you switch pilots on final approach?”
Incredibly there was a man whose wife had been robbing banks not with a mask and gun but as an accountant. Story after story left me with th awakening of a word I never thought about. Don said, “Everything in your life could be taken from you except one thing. Your freedom to choose how you will respond to a situation.”
They say the exhaustion from divorce is like a full-time job