Running Out of Excuses for Not Staying in Shape.

One of the most overzealous groups of people I know are ex-fatty’s.  They have gone from plump to pumped.  No longer does a hot fudge sundae rule their life.   They have learned the secret to controlling their weight by getting control of themselves.

I hate ’em.  They no longer go blindly through their day with their mouths open, chewing and swallowing whatever comes through their path.  They walk by the refrigerator and don’t open it.  A treat is not candy but bottled water.  They would never think of putting an M&M found under the couch into their mouth.

Don’t misunderstand me.  I have nothing but respect for these truly unpleasant self-disciplined people.  I was once one, but then something happened.  No one told me I was getting older, and without informing me, my body took it upon itself to re-adjust my metabolism from hamburgers and shakes to don’t eat a pickle, you’ll blow up.

Because I am basically a strong person, I was able to resist a lifestyle change. Unfortunately, my husband’s addiction to exercise grew steadily worse.  And to make matters worse, he is also a black belt in Karate. Naturally, for the last several years, I have tried to ignore this.

The keyword was ignored, but he has become right-out obnoxious about the benefits of sweat.  Very frankly, I don’t feel the problem of chubbiness will be worked out in my lifetime.  This seemed to be my answer until recently when I had to admit my cases of convenient excuses were growing thin while I ……

On my first day in Karate class, I was devastated.  First off, this outfit has no shoulder pads, and hiding your waistline is impossible–they make you wear a belt!

Forget combing your hair.  In less than 15 minutes, you have an entirely different hairdo–the wet look.

Of course, getting in shape doesn’t happen in a day.  You have to build up to it through a series of self-inflicted and crippling body movements that immediately cause pain.

Normally articulate and well-spoken, after a one-hour class, exhaustion sets in, loss of appetite, and all direction.

Unfortunately, by 8 p.m. that evening, I’m ready to eat a horse, and that one hour is long forgotten, until morning, when everything, including things you never think of like wrists, shriek and creak.

My friend says, “Have a tummy tuck; it’s less painful.”  I say as long as I stay a white belt, my waistline won’t be as accentuated.  I’m trying to be a good sport, but you see that is one of the problems, it’s a sport, and I have always been a spectator.  They say that studying martial arts is a lifetime experience.

I will need that time to get a black belt.


4 Bratwurst

1 large apple cored and sliced.

6 small Yukon gold potatoes

1/2 medium size cabbage cut into small wedges.

sour cream

Bring water to boil and add potatoes.  Last 10 minutes cook the bratwurst in the same water with the potatoes.  Drain and set potatoes and Bratwurst on warm platter.

Bring hot water to boil in a large pot.  Place steamer inside and add apple, cabbage over low heat until apple is soft.  Season all with salt and pepper serve warm on platter with the Bratwurst and a dollop of sour cream.

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